Unsaid Fred

Jayce has officially been in kindergarten for three weeks now.  The first two were all laidback and recess and snacks and then they went and sent homework this week.  For reals.  This guy:

I can’t help but think of him as Unsaid Fred.  He’s this totally blank canvas that Jayce is charged with turning into a mini me.  Mini him, not mini me.  The instructions were very clear.  This is a project to be done by the student.  (Read: step away from the crayons, mom).

Jayce is supposed to use whatever supplies we “have at home” to decorate this ambiguous piece of cardstock as himself.  What he looks like from his eyes.

I’m all about following directions to the tee, so I’m going to Jo-Ann tomorrow to pick up some supplies that we had on hand at home.  I’m thinking yellow yarn and blue rhinestones and maybe some denim scraps or something.  Not that I’m trying to influence the project one way or another.  But I thought it might be helpful if he had some supplies that depict what he looks like through my eyes.  Not that what I see in him is the same as what he sees in him, necessarily.

Which got me to thinking. (Always a dangerous undertaking, by the way).

how cool it would be if I could just poof! reinvent myself.  Here’s what I’d look like:

-i’d be able to dance.
-and throw dinner together with whatever i had in the pantry.
-the lines creeping up around my eyes? what lines?
-my boobs would be just a tad bigger.  to make my waist look thinner.
-my hair would be bone straight.  or fall in perfect ringlets (depending on the day).  effortlessly.
-i’d hold my tongue more.
-and know how to accessorize.
-i wouldn’t be so afraid of showing my teeth in pictures.
-i wouldn’t have to call jeff to kill all the spiders.
-i’d be a sound sleeper.
-and a runner.
-i’d be calm and collected instead of so tightly wound i might unravel  at any given second.
-i would never ever–no, not ever–be paralyzed by fear.
-there’d be no need for that stupid facial wax i suffer through every three weeks.
-i’d be more about you.  less about me.
-i’d be gracious and composed.  patient and well-spoken.
-His light would shine through me.  set me aglow.  always.  in all ways.

How ’bout you?  What would you be?


15 Replies to “Unsaid Fred”

  1. I like this. And I guess it goes to show that the grass is always greener, because I’m the opposite of many of your things, and I’d like to trade you. My straight hair for your waves. My um, over-abundant chest for a little less up top. A little less teeth in the pictures, a little more outspoken. You get the gist.

    I’d like to be one of those people that actually enjoys exercise, instead of doing it out of obligation. I’d be taller with better skin. I’d be able to raise one eyebrow (after years of practice, I still can’t pull this off without looking like I’m stroking out). I’d be more courageous, and I’d be quick with just the right words. A more patient mother. A better housekeeper. And I’d like people in general a lot more. This is something I struggle with – I fear my standards are too high. I don’t really like very many people. (I realize how terrible that sounds)

    Can’t wait to see how mini-Jayce turns out!

    1. This must be the reason that we get along – you don’t like people either! I knew there was a reason we clicked. :-)

  2. Cute. My list would be a lot like yours minus the teeth issue and the facial wax. I don’t mess with that!
    Such a neat project for Jayce!

  3. Kirsten had 1 of these last year & yes it included a trip to JoAnn for little eyes, yellow wool for her hair, mini alphabet beads to make a necklace spelling her name. We also went through my fabric stash in order to make her a pretty dress too.

    As for me, I would love to not have to constantly fight my weight; have slightly wavy hair and smaller boobs together with a little more patience for dealing with my daughter.

  4. I always struggle with the “hands off, Mom!” directions…I always want them to do so well with it that I am often guilty of a little influence here and there! I, too, go to the craft store, to grab some supplies that, of course, “we had around the house already”! (wink, wink)!

    Things I would change about me….my skin to be more smooth and have that no makeup beauty instead of blotchy, uneven, and very “un”glowing! I would have more confidence in myself. Smaller, cuter nose instead of the honker I have and hopefully that would improve the profile that I despise. I would love to be more laid back and calm as opposed to uptight and quick to anger and frustration in certain stressful situations!

  5. Does Jayce have Miss Clark, or do all the Kindergarten teachers do the same assignment? Taylor had that doll last year. :) I’m definitely with you on the boobs. Mine were never big, but they were cute. After kids? Deflated balloons. :P I’d be more patient; more Christ-like in general; a little less sarcastic (but maybe still some…); more selfless, generous, and sacrificial; dizzy-free; more inclined to exercise and be healthy; and the kind of woman, wife, mother, and Christ follower that my little girls want desperately to be like (in their own way, of course).

    1. He does not have Miss Clark, so they must all do the same assignments. I’m sorry you’re still dizzy! I thought you had that all figured out…

      1. It’s figured out as far as I know what it is now, but I also found out that unless the Lord Himself wants to take it away, it’s likely to stick with me forever. :P Still, it was a blessing to find a name for it! I’d prefer the known to the unknown almost any day of the week, even if it’s not good. It gives me the ability to move forward.

  6. Ha! This made me crack up! And I love that you have a wine magnet holding it up…something we’d do in our house, too. :)

  7. I could say so many things, but the main thing is I would relax more. I don’t relax very well at all, I always need something to do and that’s not a good thing.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.