I’m not having a good day.
My family is currently gathered in the kitchen making fun of me.
Jeff had the nerve to google “hissing dinosaur with flaps” in search of an image that he thought would perfectly suit me.
They think I’m a stress fest.
They’re wrong.
But we’re going to ignore their best impressions of a jeckyl (which I SO am not by the way). And talk instead about the ten reasons why you should not agree to make a fancy fondant birthday cake a la Ace of Cakes for your son’s third birthday party. Especially when you have absolutely zero experience in fancy fondant.
10. Marshmallow fondant is the most sticky substance known to man.
9. An entire jar of red gel food color will turn your white marshmallow fondant hot pink at best.
8. You will be required to make not one. Not two. Not three. But four. Yes four batches of sticky marshmallow fondant to produce the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse cake of your preschooler’s dreams.
7. Did I mention? Marshmallow fondant really bites.
6. All the powdered sugar this side of the Mason Dixon line will not suffice to make your marshmallow fondant less sticky.
5. Pink hands.
4. Pink hands that match your pink striped pajama top.
3. Your family will swear up and down that your pink fondant truly matches Mickey’s shorts.
2. It doesn’t. Mickey wears red. Not hot pink.
1. By the time the party arrives…your hands will be rainbow. Which might be festive for a rainbow bright party. For a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse birthday party though? Not so much.
Isn’t that a lovely shade of pink? One might even call it rosey. Not nearly as rosey as Jeff’s palms will be this time next week though. :)
Calling me a Dilophosaurus (don’t you dare google image it). That oughta teach him.
I am ROLLING because of the rosy palm comment…
You are making your own fondant? If you had told me that, I would have talked you out of it. Didn’t you read the bakerella link that I sent you?
“Okay, now you’ll need some red fondant. You can tint fondant red yourself or take the easy way and buy it already colored. (It’s a real pain to tint fondant red and get the color you want, so I’m buying this stuff anytime I can help it.)”
Bakerella can’t even make red fondant!
Honey, I get the whole “do-it-yourself” thing you like to do… but trust me. Here’s your to-do list for tomorrow:
1. Wake up
2. Get those cute kiddos off to school
3. Strap Jayce into his car seat
4. Drive your little butt to Michael’s ASAP
5. Buy double the amount of fondant you think you’ll need
6. Attempt cake again
7. Call Becca if it doesn’t work. She’ll take care of the cake.
:-)
*giggles* I googled it, but it as after I read your tweet and hadn’t read your blog yet *lol* which actually came up in the search. Oh and next time you are trying to dye fondant (or anything for that matter) red check out the craft section at walmart or you’re local craft store in the wilson section they have cake dyes they are pigment or something and always turn out the colour they are supposed to.
Been there except I was just trying to dye regular ol’ icing red (for a firetruck). I think I used the whole jar of dye and then everyone’s hands, lips, face were red for a couple of days after the party. Ha! Serves them right. PS: You and Kristen should go in together on cake decorating!
Too funny!! (The rosy comment, not the pink fondant… ;)
You are so cute with your pink (ahem, rosey) hands!
I work with this particularly nasty woman who we call the dilophosaur. It fits her much better than you!
i am convinced that red frosting is impossible to make. i’ve never gotten it darker than pink.
i made a ‘raindow’ cake for ellie’s birthday my hands looked like that ;-)
I wonder if you could just paint the fondant red with Wilton color after it’s on the cake? You know, like the way Duff and his gang are always airbrushing their cakes. Not that I’m assuming you own an airbrush or anything. I meant with a paintbrush.
The things we do for our kids!
You are too funny.
I hate how hard it is to get true red frosting. And I want to see a picture of the cake when it is done.
I cognate. Been there. Not with the mickey mouse, but with the fondant. For ella’s first birthday oh was I going to make the fanciest cake E-Ver! And like you, I’d never tried fondant before. So smart, right? Oh well. And yeah, fondant cannot ever be confused with anything that tastes even marginally good. That stuff is nasty, imho.
Can wait to see the finished product!
Been there, done that. The marshmallow fondant may taste better than the pre-made stuff, but the stuff in the package causes WAY less stress – especially the pre-dyed stuff.
Next time (like that’ll ever happen) wear disposable gloves and use the Wilton food coloring paste to get a deep red.
YES – you can use that red airbrush stuff from Michael’s to get your cake the color you want.
Well, bless you for trying! I have a good friend who does cakes and I’ve lived vicariously through her nightmare fondant tales…
Bahahaha! You are too funny! But you DEFINITELY get an A for effort!
(Poor Jeff…)
Wow this blog just went rated R.. Dont worry J mo your brother in laws got your back!! Did everyone notice how long Darce’s fingers are, where did you score those mits? Good thing you did’nt post pics of your feet..lol
The picture should been with your palms near your ears facing outward in a Dilophosaurus stance.
Oh, I can feel you pain a bit. I remember trying to get our handmade soap a red and it always coming out pink! Blah. Whatta ya gonna do? So Mickety has pink shorts– it was made with love, right? That’s what matters. :D
He really googled a hissing dinosaur with flaps? That’s so wrong. And a wee-bit hilarious.
Men.
ROFL over comment about Jeff’s palms!!
Give you big kudos for trying the fondant. Honestly, where do you find the time?!
Dilophosaurus seems to have a pink or rosey color crest.
That face your making in that pic is almost the same face you used to make when you would reanact Pippy Longstalking..
PICture of the cake?
OH fondant…..Kudos to you. (excuse my FB comment)…….I am NOT a fondant girl! Where’s a pic of the finished project? I know it must have been perfect, hissing Dilophosaurus and all…..
Oh how fun. I’ve never smiled so much. Even though you weren’t having fun, reading about it was ;)
Nell
Blue is much worse! Trust me! Oh and black.
My hands get like that each year when I cakes for my kids. I haven’t tackled fondant yet…next year I might tough.
Rosy palms…hehehehehehe